


Cotton Candy

by itsfaberrytaboo (orphan_account)



Series: Wide Green Eyes [7]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Age Play, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Bigs and littles are known, F/F, Fluff, Non-Sexual Age Play, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-29
Updated: 2016-05-29
Packaged: 2018-07-11 00:30:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7015588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/itsfaberrytaboo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She had been looking forward to the carnival for days, even if she was slightly nervous about being little out in public. It was a carnival just for littles and their caregivers, so that made it better, but Natasha hadn’t really been in public openly as Nat before, so it was more than a little terrifying.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cotton Candy

**Author's Note:**

> Please do not send your dental bills to me after reading this, thank you.

The bright lights of the carnival cast harsh shadows on the ground, and Nat couldn’t help feeling a little scared of them.

What if someone jumped out at her?

She’d been skipping ahead, excited to meet Mama’s friend and her little girl, but now Nat hung back until Mama caught up with her, and she grasped at Mama’s hand with both of hers.

“Hey.” Mama leaned down a little so she could look into her eyes. Nat loved Mama’s eyes; they were so soft and gentle, even when she sometimes got annoyed at Nat. And she knew that never lasted too long; Mama loved her too much to stay mad.

“You still want to do this, bunny?”

“Yes!” Nat bounced on the balls of her feet, living up to the nickname her Mama had given her so many months ago. She had been looking forward to the carnival for days, even if she was slightly nervous about being little out in public. It _was_ a carnival just for littles and their caregivers, so that made it better, but Natasha hadn’t really been in public openly as Nat before, so it was more than a little terrifying.

“Is just loud, Mama. Lots of people.”

“Lots of people,” Mama agreed with a tender smile; she straightened up and wrapped her arm around Nat’s shoulders, hugging her close for a moment. “But don’t worry, Mama’s right here, Nat. And I promise we’re going to have lots of fun. Oh look, there’s Bobbi and Jemma!”

The tall blonde woman stood next to the carousel, her hand tightly in that of a smaller girl’s, smiled as she caught sight of them and waved them over. She looked very nice, wearing a Star Wars tee-shirt. That was probably why Mama liked her so much, Nat thought. Still, she thought _her_ mama, in her plum-colored button-up blouse and jeans, was prettier. Mama was the most beautiful woman in the world, after all.

“Glad to see you could make it, Director Hill,” Bobbi greeted them, and Mama laughed.

“Nat has been poking me about the carnival all week, no way I’d miss it. And it’s Maria, we’re not at work, all right?”

“We’re not at work. This must be Nat!” Bobbi squatted down so that she could see Nat more clearly.

“Hello, Nat. I’m Bobbi Morse.”

Realistically, Nat knew that she knew Agent Morse. When she was big she had worked on a few ops with Morse, and Agent Simmons too. But two-year-old Nat hadn’t ever been exposed to Bobbi or Jemma while they were in their big and little headspaces.

It made her nervous, and she shied away, hiding her face against Mama’s shoulder.

“Hey, what’s this?” Mama said, a little note of amusement in her voice. “You’ve never been shy before, baby bunny, don’t start now.” Mama lead her over to a bench near the carousel, pulling Nat onto her lap and wrapping her arms around Nat’s waist.

“Now,” she said firmly. “Nat, this is Bobbi Morse, and her little girl, Jemma. Don’t you want to say hi?”

Nat wasn’t sure that she did want to, actually; the noise and crowd of the carnival seemed a bit overwhelming already. But she knew that Mama had been wanting to meet with other caregivers that weren’t Pepper and Laura and Sam, and this had been important to her. And Nat wanted more than anything to make her Mama happy.

So she nodded, and raised her head. “Hi,” she said, still a little uncertainly.

Jemma was about five years old when she was little, Mama had told Nat, and she looked every bit of it in her blue jean overall shorts, and the black and white short sleeved shirt she was wearing. Mary Jane shoes with lacy white socks completed her ensemble, and Nat felt more than a little inadequate in just her yellow flowered sundress and yellow sandals. Jemma’s hair was pulled back into a loose ponytail, and with the flashing lights of the carousel Nat could see Jemma’s hazel eyes looking at her.

Jemma clung to her own mama, too, but her smile was sweet and excited as she regarded Nat. “Mummy says you’ve never been to a carnival! Have you really never?”

Nat shook her head, her thumb finding its way to her mouth. “No,” she mumbled.

Mama pulled her hand away, and Nat whined. “Jemma needs to be able to hear you, sweetheart.”

“Oh it’s okay, Miss Maria!” Jemma exclaimed. “I suck my thumb too sometimes. I can understand Nat just fine.”

“Hmm.” Mama thought for a minute, then nudged Nat. “Go ahead, bunny.”

Nat didn’t have to be told twice; her thumb was always comforting, and tonight she seemed to need it more. She’d been afraid Jemma would think she was just a stupid baby, but Jemma was still smiling at her.

“You wanna try the merry go round first? I love it, I can’t wait to ride it. Mummy says I have to make sure that you want to do things too, and that I can’t mon- mono- um, be bossy.”

“Even when she’s five she can’t seem to let go of the dictionary,” Nat heard Bobbi say softly to Mama, and Mama chuckled.

Nat stared up at the merry-go-round, at the majestic horses that go up and down in their circles. There were a few mamas or daddies sitting on benches, too, cuddling their little girls or boys as they went round and round. Nat thought she might like that, she always loved cuddling with Mama.  But the horses…

She turned to Mama. “I can ride?” she asked hopefully.

Mama smiled and kissed her cheek. “As long as you hold on tight and don’t jump off, you can ride.”

“I won’t!” Nat clapped her hands, suddenly excited. “Want ride, Jemma!”

Jemma squealed and grabbed Nat’s hand, which was a little shocking, but she didn’t have time to recover before Jemma was pulling her to the carousel.

“What horse do you want, Nat? I like that big one, with the blue!”

Nat stood at the base, watching as the carousel slowed and its previous riders began to pile off. Then her eyes lit up.

“Red one, Jemma! Red!”

“Red one it is then,” a voice said behind her, and Nat turned to see Bobbi.

“Jemma, can you climb on?”

“Yes, Mummy!”

“All right, be careful.” Bobbi smiled down at Nat. “Your mama asked me to help you on since she can’t lift you yet. Is that all right, honey?”

Nat looked back at Mama who was stood just off to the side of the merry-go-round. She had her camera out already, and Natasha grinned. She was sad that Mama couldn’t lift her yet because of that stupid man in Washington, but she looked up at Bobbi and nodded, biting her lip.

“Yes please, Miss Bobbi,” she said politely around her thumb, and Bobbi laughed, scooping her up.

“You’re adorable,” she said. “I really like that dress on you.” She hoisted Nat onto the horse, holding onto her waist as the little girl settled into the “saddle.”

“Now, put your hands here,” she directed, folding Nat’s small hands around the shiny pole leading up into the domed ceiling. “Hold on tight and don’t let go, all right?”

“All right,” Nat said a little cautiously. It was kind of high up; she clutched tighter at the pole.

“This is going to be so much fun!” she heard Jemma call out, and Nat looked over her shoulder to see Jemma waving behind her. “Hi, Mummy!”

“The ride hasn’t even started yet, you silly thing,” Bobbi said affectionately. “I’m going to go stand with Maria while she gets lots and lots of pictures. You girls hang on. And Nat?”

She looked at Bobbi with wide eyes.

“You can call me Auntie if you want, honey. ‘Miss Bobbi’ makes me feel like an old lady!”

She tickled Nat’s belly, and the little girl laughed. She was big, but she wasn’t old at all.

“Okay, Auntie.”

Bobbi stepped off the platform to join Mama, and Nat fell against the pole with a little gasp of shock as it jolted, then began to move.

“Hang on, Nat!” Jemma cried with glee, and Nat nodded, gripping the pole tightly.

Her horse moved up, up, then down, down, and the music was loud and happy all around her. Nat dared to look over and panicked for a moment because where was Mama? But then the carousel spun back around and Nat saw her, holding up the camera and snapping away.

“Mama!” Nat called, and then she was lowering the camera and smiling at her.

“Hi Mama!”

She dared to let go of the pole with one hand and wave wildly. _This was so much fun!_ Nat thought.

“Look at you!” Mama called to her as Nat went past. “Look at my baby bunny!”

It didn’t take long before Nat was laughing happily as her horsey continued to go up, up, down, down and the platform went round and round. She could hear Jemma giggling and calling to her mummy, too, and Nat thought that she could stay here and ride forever.

But all too soon the ride slowed, then stopped, and Auntie was at Nat’s side ready to help her off the horse.

“Want go again,” Nat pouted stubbornly, and Auntie grinned.

“Uh oh, Maria, I think Jemma has created a monster,” she said to Mama, and Nat narrowed her eyes.

“M’not monster!”

Auntie laughed, and it sounded affectionate and pleased, not mocking. She lifted Nat off the horse and settled her onto the platform, holding her arm until Nat steadied a little from the dizziness.

“Of course you’re not a monster,” she said, “I just meant you love the merry-go-round as much as Jemma does, now.”

“It’s my favorite in the whole wide world,” Jemma declared as they hopped off the ride and Nat made a beeline for her Mama.

“Mama, I rode a horsey!”

“You sure did,” Mama said, gathering Nat in her arms and pressing kisses to her cheeks. “And I got lots of pictures of it. Maybe I’ll put them all in my office, hmm?”

Nat made a face. “Maybe just one.”

“Maybe all of them.” Mama tapped her nose and winked, and Natasha grinned. Mama was always so proud of her, even when she was naughty.

Nat’s attention was distracted by another little girl walking by, carrying a giant bag of pink, fluffy cotton candy. Her eyes widened again, and she tugged her Mama’s sleeve.

“Mama, Mama!” she whispered, and pointed in the little girl’s direction.

“What is it, sweetheart?”

“Can I have some? Please?”

“You want cotton candy?”

Nat nodded, giving Mama her most hopeful, pleading look, and Mama snorted.

“Look at this, Bobbi.”

Bobbi glanced over, then laughed. “Oh, wow. You weren’t kidding. She could almost give Jemma’s puppy eyes a run for their money.”

“Nuh uh!” Jemma said. “I want cotton candy too, Mummy. Pleeeease?”

“You know you’re not supposed to have sugar this late, munchkin.”

Jemma’s lower lip poked out and she scuffed at the dirt with her shoe. “All right, Mummy,” she said, her voice soft and disappointed.

Nat looked up at Auntie, who shook her head and sighed. “But I guess since it’s a special occasion…”

Jemma didn’t even let her finish. “Yay! Come on, Nat, let’s go find the cotton candy!”

“Lightweight,” Nat heard Mama mutter from behind her as Jemma took Nat’s hand and began to drag her further into the carnival.

“Shut up,” Auntie shot back. “You try telling that kid no. That pout physically _hurts_ , Maria.”

Nat decided she liked Auntie, listening to her talk back and forth to Mama. She seemed to be a lot like Mama, maybe sharp and rough around the edges sometimes, but it didn’t take a big or a little to see how much Auntie loved Jemma, just like Mama loved Nat. Nat knew that Bobbi had found Jemma when they were doing some really scary super-secret spy stuff, and Jemma had almost gotten hurt.

But Nat didn’t want to think about that.

The world around her seemed fuzzy, almost muted. It reminded Nat of the paint with water books that Mama had bought her last week. Nat still wasn’t sure if she liked it; she sometimes still resisted slipping into her little state. But it was getting easier, since Mama was always there. Mama never cared if Nat was big or little; she always let Nat decide what she needed to be.

Nat didn’t think she’d like the carnival half as much if she was big, though.

They found the cotton candy vendor, and soon Natasha was holding the biggest bag she could ever have imagined, and Jemma too. They grinned at each other before diving in; Nat yanked out a big piece and held it out to Mama.

“For me?” Mama said, pointing to herself, and Nat giggled, nodding.

“Eat, Mama!”

Mama did, closing her eyes and letting out a noise of contentment. “I haven’t had cotton candy in forever.”

“Missing out, Hill,” Auntie said, sharing Jemma’s as they cuddled up together.

Nat felt a tap on her left shoulder; she glanced back to see if maybe Steve or Tony had come to the carnival after all. But it wasn’t them; it was nobody, and she felt the cotton candy bag leave her hands and the laughter of the boy who took it as he ran away.

“What the—hey!” Mama stood up and reached for Nat as her lower lip began to tremble. “No, don’t cry, bunny, we’ll get you another bag, shh, shh, it’s okay.”

Everything that happened next was a blur. Nat heard an angry growl that sounded very much like Jemma, and saw two Mary Jane-clad feet begin to pound the dirt as she ran after the little boy.

“Oh, crap,” Auntie said. “Jemma, you get back here!”

But she’d caught up to the little boy before he’d even had a chance to realize.

“You give that back right now!” Jemma yelled, grabbing him, and the smack practically echoed over the noise of the carnival. The boy – twice her size – stared in shock, and Jemma wrestled the bag of cotton candy from his grasp.

“Not yours,” she said, her face twisted in a snarl. “This is my Nat’s, and you – can’t – have – it!”

Then the little boy’s daddy came into sight, and Auntie made it to Jemma just in time. Mama pulled Nat away and to a little picnic table off to the side, sitting down and shifting Nat so that she was standing between her legs.

“Looks like we’re having an adventure, aren’t we, little bunny?” she said, reaching up to brush away some tears that had fallen onto Nat’s face.

Nat nodded and shuffled forward to rest her head on Mama’s shoulder. Mama rubbed her back, whispering soft reassurances to her.

Moments later, Auntie and a shame-faced Jemma came back, and Auntie handed Nat her cotton candy.

“Everything all right?” Mama asked, and Bobbi nodded. “The little boy’s papa saw everything and was going to make him give it back anyway. But that’s no excuse for hitting,” she said sternly, and Jemma hung her head.

“Nat, I think there’s a little petting zoo over there, want to go?” Mama asked suddenly, and Natasha looked.

She could see goats and a tiny brown calf, and nodded eagerly. Mama took her hand and stood up.

“We’ll just be checking out the animals,” she said to Auntie.

Auntie flashed them both a smile. “We’ll meet up with you as soon as this naughty one sits for a few minutes and thinks about things.”

The baby goats head-butted Nat’s hand and made her laugh, and the sweet little calf let out a quiet _mooo_ and tried to snuggle up to her. Mama fed her small bits of cotton candy as Nat petted the animals, and she thought that this was the nicest thing in the world.

But she glanced over a bit worriedly at Jemma, only to see the little girl actually miming how she had smacked the boy, and her mummy laughing out loud, cuddling her close.

“Mama?” Nat whispered in wonderment.

“Hmm?”

“I don’t think Jemma is really in trouble…”

Mama looked over, and snorted. “I think you might be right, baby girl.”

Auntie and Jemma joined up with them minutes later, with Bobbi announcing that she was starving, so the four of them went in search of food. They decided on a hot dog stand and sat together at a picnic table. Jemma ate hers the normal way, but didn’t seem to mind that Nat had hers cut up into smaller pieces. Nat liked it that way best anyway.

“How’s the house hunting going?” Auntie asked Mama, who shrugged.

“I’ve got a couple in mind,” she said. “Natasha and I are going to go look at one tomorrow.”

“Are you going to have your own room?” Jemma asked around a mouthful of hot dog, and Auntie nudged her.

“Swallow before you talk, young lady, that’s rude.”

Jemma nodded and swallowed. “Sorry, Mummy. Are you going to have your own room?” she asked Nat again.

“Yes!” Nat said excitedly. “Mama’s gonna let me paint it yellow, all by myself!”

“And then I’ll paint over it,” Mama said, winking at Auntie. “But yes, a bright yellow room for my baby.”

“I can’t wait to have my own room,” Jemma said, a little wistful tone in her voice, and Auntie sighed, wrapping an arm around her.

“Soon, munchkin,” she said, kissing her hair. “Mummy and Jemma have to do a few more things before we can have our own house,” she explained to Nat.

“I’ll try to expedite it,” Mama said, and Auntie flashed her a grateful smile. Mama’s smile in return was rather tight, and Nat shifted on the bench so that she was snuggled up to her side. Mama tried to help everyone so much, and sometimes it made her tired and sad. Nat didn’t want her to be sad. Not tonight. Carnivals were supposed to be fun and happy.

Well, that’s what she’d heard. She really hadn’t ever been to one.

“I think we should just walk around for a bit now that we’ve eaten,” Mama said once they’d thrown all of their trash into a bin next to the picnic area, and she’d changed Nat quickly in one of the bathrooms. “You girls don’t want to get sick on a ride, that’s for sure.”

Nat wrinkled her nose. That didn’t sound like anything fun at all. And besides, there were plenty of games stretched all around them to play. Ones where you tossed bean bags into holes to win a prize, one where you tried to use a big metal claw to grab a toy, and there was one that looked like you shot a plastic gun and tried to hit the target….

Nat peered closer at that game, and gasped.

“Mama!” She tugged on Mama’s sleeve, hard.

“What is it, sweetheart?”

Nat pointed.

“Oh,” Mama said, following Nat’s finger. Then she grinned. “ _Oh_. Well, would you look at that.”

Nat grinned, bouncing on her heels again, her hands clasped to her chest. “Please, Mama, please, please, please.”

“What are we looking at?” Auntie asked curiously, coming up to stand next to them.

Now Mama pointed. “We’re looking at that.”

It was the top prize for the shooting game: a squat, fat grey stuffed hippo with a wide-mouthed grin. Nat had been wanting a stuffed hippo ever since she’d realized she was little, and Mama had promised her that when they found one, it was hers.

“Huh,” Auntie said. “Hit the target, win the prize. Gee, Hill, I don’t know if you can do that. Are you a good shot?”

Mama rolled her eyes. “Stand back and watch how it’s done, Morse.”

Thirty minutes later, Mama was swearing under her breath, she was down to her last spare dollar that hadn’t been reserved for rides, and the stuffed hippo still hung from the display. Auntie looked positively confused; Jemma was bored and was drawing what seemed to be math problems in the dirt with a stick.

She wouldn’t cry, Nat told herself. It was okay if Mama couldn’t get the hippo. Even if she really, really wanted it.

“Do you want me to—“

“No!” Mama snapped, staring down the sight of the gun. “I’m just nervous… it’s a lot of pressure!”

“How is it a lot of pressure? It’s a _game_ , you’ve shot HYDRA with your eyes closed.”

Nat edged away slightly; she didn’t want to be reminded of any of _that_ when she was in her little headspace. She caught Jemma’s eye and Jemma smiled at her.

“Big talk,” she said, making a face. Nat giggled and felt a little better.

Behind her, she heard Mama sigh.

“It’s for _her_. She’s wanted this for months, and I’m going to kick myself if I don’t get it for her.” Mama stood up from the plastic rifle and stretched her shoulders.

“It’s weird to go from being not just the director of SHIELD, but trying to actually be someone’s superhero.”

Nat’s thumb meandered to her mouth and she shuffled over to stand by Mama, wrapping her arm around Mama’s waist and clinging to her. Mama smiled down at her.

“Everything okay, baby?”

Nat nodded, then tugged so that Mama would lean down and Nat could whisper into her ear.

“Don’t need hippo. Mama still hero.”

Mama’s eyes were a little wet when she shifted back into a standing position, and she took Nat’s head in her hands and kissed her forehead with a loud smacking noise. Nat giggled and struggled away; Mama winked. She took a deep breath, leaned into the sight of the plastic gun, and aimed.

“Mama, can we ride something else?” Nat asked five minutes later, tucking the hippo under her arm and holding on to Mama’s hand with her other. “It’s been almost two whole hours since dinner!”

“I think it’s been about _one_ hour, kiddo,” Auntie said, ruffling Nat’s hair. She was swinging Jemma’s hand as they walked, pausing every now and then to give her a hug and kiss to her cheek. Jemma seemed to crave affection just as much as Nat did.

“Then that’s enough time!” Jemma said. “Mummy, a person’s metabol—“

“Hey, what’d I tell you about science at the carnival?” Auntie said, and Jemma flushed pink.

“’No science at the carnival,’” she answered.

“Exactly, no science at the carnival. How about that little roller coaster over there? That looks fun.”

They rode the roller coaster, which really was more like a train ride with only a small incline and drop at the end, but Nat didn’t mind. It went fast, and she liked fast. Then Mama found a haunted house ride and that gave Nat an excuse to pretend to be really, really scared and cling to Mama during the whole thing. Mama only laughed a little and held Nat close.

“I’ll protect you,” she whispered, and nuzzled Nat’s cheek – then shrieked when a “monster” jumped out at them.

“I think Nat need to protect Mama,” she remarked, and behind her, she heard Auntie laugh, hard.

Jemma and Nat and Auntie and Mama then climbed into what resembled a large cup, that spun around and around and whipped from one side of the ride to the other, and Nat squealed and held on, feeling happier than she ever had in her life. She barely remembered that she had been resistant to the idea of the carnival at first.

“I’m not actually a child,” Natasha had said, a little grumpily, when Maria had first approached the subject with her.

“I know you’re not,” Maria had responded. “But you are my little girl, and you deserve to have fun. I want you to be able to do things you never have before.”

Both Mama and Nat knew there were a lot of things she hadn’t been able to do, when she was growing up into big Natasha. Maria and Natasha had actually made a list. Well, Maria had made a list. She listened to Natasha, a lot, and had taken to writing things down. If there was something Natasha hadn’t done, Maria tried to make it happen.

Like baking a cake together. Nat being rocked to sleep while Mama sang a lullaby. Having a picnic.  Mama had a list so far that was three pages long, and when they got home, Mama would mark off Go to a Carnival, and think about what to do next.

And Nat knew she’d be excited about whatever it would be.

The crowd at the carnival had mostly filtered out; only a handful of the older littles remained, and Nat was steadily growing tired. But Jemma seemed to have endless energy, and she begged her mummy to let her go on “just one more ride” before they left for the night.

“I don’t know,” Mama mused, looking at the sign for the Paratrooper. “I think Nat might be a bit too little for this one.”

“I not too little!” Nat said, insulted. It was just a ride; she wasn’t a _baby_.

“Sweetheart, it just swings up awfully high, I don’t want you to get scared.”

“I can be brave,” Nat said. “I wanna go, Mama, please?”

Mama looked helplessly at Auntie, who shrugged. “Your call. Jemma does fine on it. But it’s the last one for the night, munchkin, hear me?”

“Okay, Mummy!” She turned to Nat’s mama. “Please, Miss Maria?”

“You know, this whole Miss Maria thing makes me feel ninety years old,” Mama said. “If I let Nat go on it will you call me Auntie Maria?”

“Yes!” Jemma said, clapping her hands. “Yes, I will.”

Mama looked at the ride again. “Nat, sweetheart, are you _sure_?”

“Yes,” Nat said stubbornly. “Wan’ go.”

Mama shook her head. “I don’t like this at all. Jemma, you hold onto her, all right? You’re in charge.”

Jemma puffed out her chest. “I’ll take good care of her, Auntie Maria, I promise!”

She took Nat’s hand and led her through the line, happily kicking her feet as the man strapped them into their seat, and locked the metal bar into place in front of them.

“I really like your mama,” Jemma said, and Nat grinned.

“I really like your mummy.”

“When you get your new house, can I come play?” Jemma asked a little shyly. “Mummy and I only have the base, and hotels sometimes.”

Nat furrowed her brow. “Maybe you can come to the farm? I ask Mama.” She squeaked a little when the “car” they were in lurched, and the ride began to move. “But you come play with me too.”

The ride lifted a little higher, and Nat looked down to see Mama watching her, a worried expression on her face. Nat waved happily.

“Hi Mama, love you!”

That made Mama smile, and she saw Auntie lightly bump Mama’s shoulder with hers.

The night was dark and sparkling with a thousand lights; the world was underneath her and Nat thought that surely, surely there hadn’t ever been so much fun and happiness. It was cotton candy and Christmas, playing with Steve and Clint and Tony and Jemma, lullabies and hugs, all rolled into one.

Suddenly the ride dipped and Nat found herself soaring towards the ground, only to be jerked back upwards again, ever higher, as the ride began to circle faster and faster. Her eyes widened, and she had the sudden realization that she really… didn’t like this.

At all.

A whimper escaped her lips as she was flung towards the ground again; Jemma was laughing excitedly and Nat’s hands tightened around the bar that was the only thing protecting her from going flying off into nowhere.

Back up she went, even higher, and Nat shut her eyes.

“M-mama…”

She was crying before the ride even made its next rotation.

“Nat?”

She felt Jemma’s arm wrap around her waist.

“Want off,” Nat managed to say, squeezing her eyes as they were jerked again, knocking against the side of the car. “Want off, Jemma, want _off_.”

“Hold on, Nat,” she heard Jemma say, her voice sounding far away. “It’s almost over, I got you.”

The ride seemed to go even faster, too fast, and Nat felt that it would lift off its foundation and she’d be gone forever, that she’d never see Mama again and she was so scared, so scared and tired. She held fast to the bar and to Jemma, crying for her Mama and resolving to never again go to another carnival. Ever.

Jemma’s face was snuggled next to hers, and Nat was barely aware that the ride was actually, finally, slowing down. “It’s okay, Nat, we’re gonna get off. Mummy and Auntie Maria are gonna be here in just a minute, you’ll see. It’s okay, I promise. Don’t cry, it’s okay.”

And the ride did stop, but Nat didn’t open her eyes, she was crying too hard.

“Well, what have we here?” the man operating the ride said kindly, unlatching the bar and lifting it up. “Come on, little ladies, off you go.”

But Nat was powerless to move, shaking as she continued to hold on to Jemma.

“Mummy, help!” Jemma called, and in a second Nat felt Auntie’s strong arms pulling her up out of the ride car.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Auntie said, patting Nat’s back. “It’s all right, honey, you’re okay. Come on, let’s go get your mama.”

“What _happened_?” It was Mama’s voice, and Nat whimpered, holding out her arms blindly. Mama settled Nat into her lap, rocking her and kissing her cheeks.

“She got scared,” Jemma said quietly. “I tried to help.”

“You’re a big help, munchkin,” Auntie said to her. “I’m proud of you.”

“I think someone was a lot more tired than she let on,” Mama said, and Nat sniffled as she calmed down, burying her face into Mama’s neck and holding onto her hippo with her other arm.

“Today was a big day for you, wasn’t it, bunny?”

Nat nodded, and Mama rubbed her back. “Well, then I think we should go home and get some sleep, how’s that sound?”

Nat looked up at Mama with tear-filled eyes, then at Jemma and Auntie, who were smiling at her sympathetically.

“M’sorry,” she said, and Auntie waved her hand dismissively.

“Don’t even do that, honey,” she said. “When you feel better I’ll tell you about the time I took Jemma to get her picture taken with the Easter bunny. That was not a good day.”

“That’s not fair, Mummy,” Jemma huffed, and Auntie kissed the top of her head.

“Do you think you can walk to the car, or do you want Bobbi to carry you?” Mama asked Nat.

“Walk,” Nat whispered, and Mama nodded and kissed the tip of her nose.

She was practically asleep on her feet before they made it to the car, Nat’s hand held securely in her Mama’s. But she perked up a little when she felt Jemma’s hand slip into her free one, and squeeze gently. Jemma didn’t think she was a stupid baby, Nat knew. And she’d apparently been scared sometimes too. Maybe it was okay to be too little for certain things. Especially when nobody laughed at her, and when Mama was always there to make her feel better.

“Let me drive you home,” Auntie suggested when they reached the parking lot. “I can help you carry Nat inside, and you can send for the car in the morning.”

“Yeah, I think that sounds like a good idea.” Even Mama was yawning now.

“Mummy, can I sit up front with you?” Jemma asked hopefully.

“Jemma, you know you’re not all—“

“Let her,” Maria interrupted. “It’s only just this once, and I think Nat needs to be close to me right now.”

“Looks like you’re in luck, munchkin. Say thank you to Maria.”

“Thank you, Auntie Maria!”

They piled into the car then, Auntie and Jemma in the front and Mama in the back, with Nat’s head in her lap. Nat sucked her thumb and hugged her hippo close, listening to Auntie and Jemma’s soft, loving chatter, and feeling Mama gently stroke her hair.

“Sleepy, Mama,” she mumbled around her thumb.

“Oh, I think that’s an understatement,” Mama teased, and leaned down to kiss her forehead. “Did you have fun?”

“Mm-hmm,” Nat said drowsily. “Wan’ do it again. No whirly ride.”

“No, no more whirly rides for you, little bunny.”

“Mama, we have house tomorrow?”

“We’ll think about that tomorrow,” Mama said.

Nat nodded and took a deep breath, snuggling further into Mama’s lap. She fell asleep thinking of a big new house, of Mama’s lullabies and playing with Jemma in her very own yellow room.


End file.
